139218

Joke of the Day

"How does a Welshman find a sheep in tall grass? Attractive"

"Password insecurity questions: 1. What was your highschool nickname? 2. How would you describe your breath? 3. What's wrong with your toes?"

"[Voice from police helicopter] PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR! *raises hands* *takes flattering selfie in helicopter spotlight* *uploads new avi*"

"The toilet felt abandoned... ... but pubic cares :) sorry... I just had to."

"Why did the vampire have to get glasses? Because he was blind as a bat! (My 4 year old sister came up with this one yesterday)"

"With great power comes great electricity bill."

"Mother: Did you get a good place in the geography test? Fred: Yes Mum I sat next to the cleverest kid in the class."

"I can't believe my kamikaze joke crashed and burned like that!"

"I'm going to start making my own baby food... What's the best cut of baby?"

"What do you call a walrus that's been hit by a bus? Dead."