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Joke of the Day

"Me: Dad, How did you guys manage without Whatsapp & Facebook? My Dad: We used to keep useless information to ourselves."

"What's the derivative of Amazon? Amazon Prime"

"What did the Nazi Officer say when he saw the Americans approaching? Au Schwitz!"

"What's the difference between your momma and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck, and I forget the rest of the joke but your mother's a whore."

"What do you call a cookie without legs? A cookie"

"Should I ever go missing, please don't let the news use my 7th grade picture."

"There are some problems in life that can be solved with chocolate....others require a full clip and a shovel."

"*With only office supplies, she diffuses the bomb with 1 second to spare* Boss: What are you doing? Me: *shoves action figures in desk.*"

"5 MINUTES & NO LIKES'? Well then... *deletes status*"

"Minnesota is my favorite state that sounds like it's a small soft drink."