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Joke of the Day

"The thing about.... What's the hardest thing about being a being a pedophile nowadays? Too many damn sexy 9 year olds."

"What did the pro bono plastic surgeon say to their patient on Dec 31st? Happy new ears Eve!"

"Why did the cautious gambler never go camping? He didn't want to stake his tent."

"Did you hear a med school is accepting animals as students? They're calling it the hippocampus."

"What did the ZERO say to the EIGHT? Nice belt"

"SO AFTER I CAUGHT HER CHEATING ON ME I WANTED TO JUMP OUT OF A PLANE AND DIE. ANYWAY MY NAME'S TOM AND I'LL BE YOUR TANDEM PARACHUTE PARTNER"

"Pretty weird to think that in the future, there will be old people named 'Hailey' and 'Brayden' running around in vintage Twilight t-shirts."

"What did the woman say when she was diagnosed with cerebal palsy? Nothing, she was too disabled to speak"

"I would tell you a joke about UDP But you might not get it"

"First trick or treater of the day just came round dressed as Gloria Gaynor At first I was afraid, I was petrified."