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Joke of the Day

"If I could have sex with any historical figure it would be Marie Antoinette. I hear she gives good head."

"When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down."

"It's not that Trump is a traitor. He's an ""alternative patriot."""

"I quit cold turkey. I just reheat it now."

"My girlfriend was crying after she had a miscarriage... I said, ""don't worry hunny, at least it was still born..."""

"Q: What did the rude prism say to the light beam that smacked into him? A: Get bent!"

"I wish I were a glow worm, A glow worm's never glum. ""Cause how can you be grumpy, when the sun shines out your bum?!"

"[OC] Pun Joke (You might have to say this out loud) What did one smell say to the odor? ""You stink at telling jokes."""

"How does cheese get more mature? Fromage"

"I hate being bipolar... It's awesome!"