138075

Joke of the Day

"*knuckle tats* ( S | H | H | H) ( H | H | H | H ) (I'm a librarian)"

"According to my Nike fitness app, I watched TV for 6 miles this week."

"Whoever said imitation is the sincerest form of flattery hasn't had a 7yo mimicking their every word for the last 10 minutes."

"What do you call a Mesoamerican unicorn? Unimaize"

"Last night, my sexy Japanese friend asked me out for dinner. ""Hey, you wanna go for sushi? It's on me."" It's funny 'cause I paid the bill."

"Yo' mama is so stupid... (OC) She thinks Salmonella is a Disney fish princess."

"Best Joke ever My life"

"A joke so absolutely filthy I can't put it in the title Rio Olympics"

"[commercial] [man comes home after long day, opens front door and is attacked by 8 cats] MAN: There has to be a better way! Narrator: DOGS"

"What's a crossfit bro's favorite Italian dish? Testosteroni."