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Joke of the Day
"When you try to prove to someone that something doesn't work, it will."
Next Joke
"Downvotes for being a Trump supporter should only be worth 3/5ths of a downvote... You know why."
"[Me narrating a documentary on guerrilla warfare] And here's more footage of people, but I'm sure apes will be in this film any minute now.."
"Why was the pregnant woman screaming ""wouldn't, shouldn't, couldn't!""? She was having contractions."
"What does Charles Darwin use to moisturise his skin? Evo-lotion."
"Hitler was bad. He is going to Heil. get it? heil?"
"Sorry we don't serve time travelers here Two time travelers walk into a bar"
"I just saved a bunch of monkeys on car insurance by telling them that monkeys don't drive so they don't need insurance."
"A friend will bail you out of jail, a best friend knows the password to your phone so they can delete all your nude selfies if you die"
"Why do presidents have unsatisfied wives? It takes four years to get an election."