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Joke of the Day
"Why did no one believe the Psychologist ever went to the bathroom? Because the 'P' is silent"
Next Joke
"Please follow the instructions 1) Read all instructions 2) Sacrifice a goat 3) Cut off your fingers 4) Eat glass 5) Only do number one"
"[doing an identification at the coroner's office] It's not her; my wife has a head."
"Mistakenly used yahoo for searching instead of google. It's like someone used google two days ago & is trying to remember the results."
"God doesn't play dice well, that's what he tells Mrs God."
"Three blondes are sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is sucking hers one is biting hers one is licking hers. Which one is married? The one with the wedding ring YOU SICK-O!"
"How do you know if the camera you just bought was made in Asia? If the shutter makes a ""crick"" noise."
"What do you call a Sith Lord who lives in the woods? Darth Deciduous"
"Suitable for British consumption I just heard the UK strawberry picking championships has been won by a woman with no legs. Jammy cunt"
"What do you call a drummer who has lost one of his drumsticks? A conductor."