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Joke of the Day
"How do you make a fruit cordial? Be nice to him."
Next Joke
"Tips for Guys on Valentine's Day: Tell your girl you already got somethingn and make her guess. She'll automatically list things she want."
"Cocaine so white it looks around the room before saying ""nigga"""
"Me: yes, I'll take the free burger Cashier: sir, you have to buy one to get one Me: I only want one though, the free one"
"How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Cut the rope."
"I broke up with my gym We just weren't working out."
"When you sit next to a talker at the movies you're allowed to hit them in the face and move seats. It's in the ticket fine print."
"For $100,000 I will come into your organization and evaluate whether the other consultants you're working with are idiots."
"Jaws 2 (1978): after the sudden death of his father, a young shark is forced to take over the family business in a seaside resort."
"My girlfriend spilt hummus all over her... Can't believe that chick pea'd herself"