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Joke of the Day

"How do you kiss a girl on valentines day? You use tulips."

"Why didn't the pirate get into the movie? It was rated rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

"What do you call it when two hobbits are involved in a footrace that is too close to call A Frodo-finish"

"What's the difference between pop stars and porn stars? Porn stars can probably sing."

"Turns out the button on the elevator with the fireman's hat on it is not the button for a free fireman's hat."

"Knock, Knock... Who's there? The Gestapo. Gestapo who? Ve ask ze questions, schwein."

"How do you get a black man out of a tree? Cut the rope."

"Why is Dick Clark a favourite star with horses? Because he was a disk jockey from Filly!"

"You wanna know how I hold my liquor? By the ears :p"

"Crayons are a lot like M&M's. All of the colors taste the same."