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Joke of the Day

"I nearly bought a car today but had a lucky escape when I checked the fine print I discovered it had driver aids ..!"

"What do you call the first sperm that reaches the egg? The ova achiever"

"Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day? Sure, they're very scent-imental! "

"What did the zombie say when he walked into the wrong tomb? I have made a grave mistake."

"What's the worst thing about being Thai? Everyone automatically assumes you have a small dick, even though you're a female."

"I was once a man stuck in a woman's body Then my mother gave birth"

"On the baseball diamond, I'm like a T-Rex. I have a short arm."

"I wish I could press a finger to this loud, profane, obnoxious boy's forehead and instantly transmit to him the sadness of being an adult."

"I'll never forget my grandfathers last words to me... ""You better be still holding that ladder"""

"What do ducks smoke? Quack!"