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Joke of the Day

"I used to think I was homophobic. It turns out that I was just afraid of monsters in the closet."

"Before I give a speech, I always tell myself I won't quote Linkin Park But in the end it doesn't even matter"

"Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side? He's all right now."

"What wasn't stolen when CVS was looted during the Baltimore riots? The Father's Day cards."

"Balloon's What's a balloon's favorite genre of music? Pop."

"Chainsaws: because ""The Texas Weed-whacker Massacre"" just wasn't scary enough"

"Why can't vets use dank memes? Because they'd get fired for beating a dead horse."

"What do strippers and Hillary Clinton have in common? They rely too much on polls"

"Butt weight. There's more!"

"I'll never understand how Americans use cheese from tubes or slices as everyday food... We should definitely make America grate again."