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Joke of the Day

"How does a black girl know she's pregnant? When she takes out her tampon, all of the cotton is picked."

"Why was the girl's bellybutton bruised? Because her boyfriend was blind."

"I wish mirrors and cameras would get together and figure out what I really look like."

"I bought a 12 pack of condoms the other day. The cashier asked if I'd like a bag, I said ""Nah, I'll just turn the lights off""."

"My girlfriend told me to give her 12 inches and make it hurt. So I fucked her 3 times and punched her in the face."

"I love collective nouns: a pod of dolphins, a mob of kangaroos, a Gosselin of douches."

"Q.Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A. He was feeling crummy!"

"Why don't you hear any knock knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings."

"I tried to smuggle LSD across the border using my ass The bag broke, then I had the shittiest trip"

"Wife asked me to get ""bath stuff"" for xmas. Hope she likes her toaster."