135888
Joke of the Day
"Bungee jumping is like getting a blowjob from your grandma.. It's all good until you look down."
Next Joke
"Actually, conservation of angular momentum makes the world go 'round."
"Dear airlines, spend less money making cutesy safety videos and pass those savings on to your customers. Wouldn't that be cool?"
"Mafia Boss: You wearin' a wire? Me: ""Wire"" you asking me that? lol get it [the rest of this tweet takes place on the bottom of a river]"
"Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat? Because if they fell forwards, they would still be in the boat."
"Hey bartender, pour me another, I see ugly people."
"What does Miley Cyrus eat on Thanksgiving? Twerkey!"
"There are 10 types of people... (with a twist) There are 10 types of people, those who know binary and those who don't and those who understand the off-by-one error."
"I was at my friend's house the other day and saw his dog licking its balls. ""Oh, I wish I could do that"" I said, my friend then replied back ""Give him a biscuit and he might let you"""
"What's the hardest thing about a burning orphanage? My dick."