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Joke of the Day
"Sharks would be a lot less scary if they had ears."
Next Joke
"Why do the bald seem to handle life so much better than the rest? They're always eager for more on their pate."
"I had a second stomach surgically attached so I could finish my fries from Five Guys."
"Whenever I meet a new girl, I introduce myself by shaking hands with my left hand. I don't want her to meet her competition right away."
"My buddy asked me what it's like now that I'm circumcized I told him not much has changed, I just get a little less head."
"Girlfriends are like phone apps They come with in-app purchases, and need the reassurance of updates to function well."
"Why are assholes always more successful than you? Because they make shit happen."
"[at heaven's gate] God: Tell me why I should let u in Me: I've never made anyone look at my baby's ultrasound pic God: You can have my bed"
"What concert costs $0.45 50 Cent with Nickelback as the opening act."
"What do you call a stuck up slut? Cuntseeded"