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Joke of the Day
"I think RoastMe should be renamed... to DaisExMachina."
Next Joke
"two peanuts walk into a bar one was a salted"
"Q: How can u drop an egg onto a concrete floor without breaking it? A: Any way you want, concrete floors tend to be very hard to crack."
"I'm pretty sure my parents are getting me a sweater for Christmas, but I really would have preferred a moaner or screamer."
"Anything is 'bite size' if your mouth is big enough."
"People who incessantly go on and on about replacing things that taste good with quinoa, please stop"
"How many libertarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, the lightbulb has to pull itself up by the bootstraps and screw itself in"
"Why do college students already get up at 7? Because the supermarket closes at 7:30"
"RT if you just read Facebook for the ads"
"What's brown, and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre......"