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Joke of the Day

"It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July."

"What do elephants do in the evenings ? Watch elevision !"

"If you woke up naked, in the middle of the forest with no memory of what happened and your butt is covered in lube, would you tell anyone? ""*No!*"" Wanna to go camping?"

"My fiance said the funniest thing out of context today. Lewis and Clark were so starved on their exploration, Sacajawea had a hard time understanding why they didn't eat Seaman."

"Why did the mexican take xanax? For hispanics attacks"

"What does a memelord put on his sandwich? L-mayo"

"Sir you haven't touched your custard. I'm just waiting for the fly to stop using it as a trampoline !"

"I heard Sylvia Brown died... Bet she didn't see that coming."

"Did you hear about the guys who stole Ar off the periodic table? They Argon and got away."

"Test results are in, you might want to have a seat ""I'd rather stand"" Are you sure? You have ""Falls Down When Gets Bad News"" disease *Thud*"