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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't North Korea's population exponentially grow? Because they must build additional pylons."

"Alligators can grow up to 8 feet! Though most only have 4"

" My friend's dog died the other day so I surprised her by going out and getting her an identical dog. She was furious, she said *""what am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?""*"

"Autocarrot sucks!"

"no, dont go there dont touch that no, leave it alone keep your hands off! a typical morning with my 3yo (or pissed off with my husband)"

"Gas should cost /gallon. Since the price is irrational."

"Plot twist Standing next to my stalkers bed watching him sleep"

"What bird tastes just like butter ? A stork !"

"Ants can carry twenty times their own body weight, which is a very useful information.. If you're moving and you need help carrying a potato chip across town."

"That dress looks great on you, but it would look even better on my floor. *buys identical dress, throws it on the ground*"