130447

Joke of the Day

"PC problem Political correctness has become so oppressive. I can't even say ""Black paint"" anymore, I have to say ""Jamal would you please paint that fence?"""

"What do you get when you cross a flea with a rooster? An itchy cock."

"So a Black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder... The bartender says ""Wow, that's something real special you've got there! Where'd you get it?"" ""Africa!"", says the parrot."

"Rick Astley will let you borrow of all of his Pixar movies except for one. He's never gonna give you Up"

"How do you get your partner to give you head? Put them in a guillotine."

"Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactoes"

"What do you call it when a person falls ill from watching too many BBC period dramas? Downton Syndrome"

"6'5"" guy: [starts a fight with me at the bar] me: [hides behind GF] GF: HEY, WHAT THE F- me: look, we need more strong female lead char-"

"Did you know the government can drug test our water supply?! That's why I never piss near a toilet. Instead - I piss on your mom. Shes by the trash.... (not the toilet)"

"What's a pirate's favourite Roman numeral? You might think it's II, but his true love be the C."