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Joke of the Day

"isnt it odd how people kill flys just because they're annoying if people killed people for being annoying i would've died like 15 years ago"

"people of reddit... You copy my jokes, You paste my links, You bury my comments. Godmam it, and my mom made every one pie, sleep over at my house..."

"Why is 2 Phosphorus Oxygen Carbon the greatest rapper from the elements? 2POC"

"Girl are you a dishwasher? Because I would like to fill you with my dirty load in the evening, turn you on, and fall asleep before you finish"

"Whats the saddest thing about global warming/iceberg melting? Polar bears won't be able to keep their cokes cold."

"What's long and green and has an asshole at each end? A St. Patrick's Day parade!"

"boss: trouble at home? me: [jumps awake at my desk] yeah boss: wife giving you grief? me: there's a bee in my kitchen"

"How did Jamie find Cersei in the long grass? Satisfying."

"Saw a sign outside of an office building which said.. .. ""Today's workshop 'How To Cope With Disappointment' has been cancelled"""

"Pac-Man What should you do before you criticize Pac-Man? WAKA WAKA WAKA mile in his shoes."