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Joke of the Day

"So I used to date this graphic designer... We broke up because I caught her cheating. Writing hundreds of letters to some guy named Lorem Ipsum. What a creep, right?"

"How do you get a Jewish prostitute high? You stone 'er."

"Why aren't there any republicans in Star-Trek? Because it's the future."

"Capitalism is controlled by an ""invisible hand"" that gives most people the invisible finger."

"What did Cinderella say when her photos did not show up? Someday my prints will come."

"Roses are Red, Violets are blue... ...I've got Alzheimers, cheese on toast"

"All these fireworks and still my girlfriend has the shortest fuse."

"Why does James Bond keep telling people his real name? Worst. Spy. Ever."

"People, today, I met and chatted up a super-hot stripper at Walmart. Sorry, there's no punch line - I'm still too shocked to write one."

"The fattest Knight at the round table was Sir Cumference. He had too much pi"