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Joke of the Day

"One thing that Sean Connery asked his wife only once and never again. To sit on his face."

"What do you call a deer that can't see? No eye deer. Say it fast and with a southern accent for full effect."

"If I was a bodybuilder I would slather up with grease and slide to work instead of driving to save money."

"What's a zombie say when he gets a letter from his girlfriend? It's a dead letter day."

"Yeah, America is the so called ""land of the free"", but you try to bring a monkey on board the plane and suddenly everyone's all about rules."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam you cant jelly yo dick in a bitch's ass"

"How do moms from West Virginia know when their daughters start their period? Their son's dick starts tasting like blood"

"I had a jacket stolen from me tonight. My enemies will stop at nothing to keep me from maintaining a comfortable body temperature in style"

"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord. My ass!"

"Dad, What is your favorite music genre ? Elevator music"