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Joke of the Day

"Couldn't afford a butterfly knife, so I got a caterpillar one. Now, I wait."

"I used to give anal to other men... But it's all behind me now."

"Yo mama is like the gas station. Pump and Pay."

"If Bears ruled the world, I wonder if they would care whether or not the Humans they mauled were free-range."

"M: What do you want for dinner? H: I don't care, you decide M: Sushi? H: No, but whatever. M: Mexican? H: Nah, but your call. He's dead now"

"What did the mod say when he was wrong? [BANNED]"

"What is a white supremacist's favorite dessert? Cake Cake Cake"

"""I made $200.05 giving BJ's to people yesterday."" ""Who gave you a nickel?"" ""Everyone did."""

"Gas is so cheap right now, I just buy a new car when I run out."

"How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex? You just call me..."