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Joke of the Day
"I watched a tv show about beavers today... Best dam program I've ever seen!"
Next Joke
"I just found out that my blood type is B negative. That's the worst one. My day is ruined."
"I'm that asshole who puts an ""o"" at the end of a word and calls it Spanish."
"I don't like my masseuse... She just rubs me the wrong way."
"What would you call it when a dinosaur gets into a car crash? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks"
"""One man's trash is another man's treasure."" is one way to tell your kid that they're adopted."
"*pulls fire alarm in apt building* *everyone runs outside* [Me on megaphone]IVE GATHERED U HERE B/C SOME OF U STILL HAVE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS UP"
"Did you hear about that giant cooling device in Florida? It was a Miami heat fan."
"It's wisest to pick the side of the person who knows the most shit about you"
"After record breaking single day sales at Chic-Fil-a amid the same sex controversy today CEO of Jack in the Box Ted Fuller said he ""hates Jews and Mexicans."""