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Joke of the Day

"*pulls fire alarm in apt building* *everyone runs outside* [Me on megaphone]IVE GATHERED U HERE B/C SOME OF U STILL HAVE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS UP"

Next Joke
 
"Girl, you look like trash. Can I take you out?"
"Yo mama's so fat she has titties in the front AND in the back"
"Money talks ...but all mine ever says is good-bye."
"What is the difference between a Snowman and a Snowwoman? Snowballs"
"A joke my grandfather told me about insecurity Never mind, it's stupid"
"No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping paper tube is still a light saber."
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"People call me the most disoriented U-boat captain of the 20th century... Oops wrong sub."
"If someone peed on me during sex, I'd be like, ""Ha! I've read about this!"""