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Joke of the Day

"My little girl loves helping me when I'm doing the cooking, because I always let her lick the spoon. The sooner she's old enough to buy her own heroin, the better."

"2+2=5 for extremely large values of 2."

"What do gay horses eat? Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"

"Why did Adele cross the road? So she could say hello from the other side"

"Playing with Silly Putty is like chewing gum for your hands."

"What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? Can I hold your hand hand hand hand?"

"Nana's house is getting real bad, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting another dead cat."

"Someone should make a joke about music... I've never seen it done on a major scale."

"How do you say goodbye to an Indonesian? with a big wave"

"A lot of beautiful women have told me that I am a looker... and that I should stop."