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Joke of the Day

"I gave self deprecating humor a go once... ...I was terrible at it."

"I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off."

"[High school reunion] Classmate: I've been out building schools in Africa Me: I got banned from the zoo for gluing sideburns onto a dolphin"

"why did god create the yeast infection so women could see what it's like to live with a miserable cunt"

"I've got two part time jobs. I'm a boxer, and a warm up act at the comedy club. I read between the punchlines."

"At least 12 dead after shooting in Paris Bet they never thought they would be killed from a magazine."

"What sentence is vastly shorter after you remove one word from it? Child porn"

"What do you call a conversation about weed? A diskushion."

"If at first you don't succeed, Skydiving isn't for you."

"You think you've got problems?I dropped my cocaine in the snow this morning."