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Joke of the Day

"girl [smiling]: hey, how are you!? me [visibly nervous]: not much!"

"The Suicide Bomber Teacher said to his student... ""Come here and listen closely, I'm only gonna show you this once""..."

"A blind man finally got his vision back He was so happy he became paralysed"

"The best part of being an adult is eating whatever you want. I just ate a small man that pissed me off at the liquor store."

"What's the difference between feminism and a $100 bill? A $100 bill makes change"

"People who say that they don't have time for my bullshit need to learn how to manage their time better. Wake up an hour earlier."

"imagine if poop was transparent. I'd completely lose my shit"

"What is the best way to make your dick look and feel really big? Fuck a toddler."

"A line for cops who pull over attractive drunk models If I could put you in the alphabet, I would go D U I and that's why I'm a writer, I look forward to your hatred of bad jokes"

"Double standards are not fair! When miley cirus gets naked and licks hammers its beautiful and artistic, but when I do it its weird, creepy and I get a life time ban from Ikea."