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Joke of the Day
"What kind of papers do dogs write? A ruff draft."
Next Joke
"*buys extra movie ticket seat so I'll have a place to put my microwave bc I'll be damned if I'm paying that much for popcorn"
"Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last long if you're fat."
"Did you hear the one about Stevie Wonder? Neither did he"
"I DON'T WANT YOUR PITY but I'll take it."
"Jesus: Listen guys, why has someone written 'nail appointment' in my diary? Judas: No idea, J. No idea."
"I bought 37 self-help books today... I just couldn't help myself."
"I just completed a one month long diet... And all I lost was 30 days."
"Don't judge a woman by her granny panties but by what's inside."
"Me - ""Hey kiddo, you have your shoes on the wrong feet"" My 6 year old - ""I ain't got no other feet"""