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Joke of the Day

"What if dogs are way smarter than we think and they just play dumb so they don't have to work and pay taxes."

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"TIL that the Beatles had to change the lyrics to Hello Goodbye because it was too ""british"". The original was ""Oi Mate Piss Off"""
"Classic one How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her."
"What's the difference between my jokes and my penis? Girls don't laugh at my jokes."
"Why did the Xbox One eat its cereal for breakfast, but not its pancakes? It had the spoon, but not the 4k."
"Why don't they teach sex-ed and drivers-Ed on the same day in the Middle East? Because the camels can't handle it."
"Masturbating while hooked up to a heart monitor can really mess with a hospital staff They never know if you're coming or going"
"Do not be racist; be like Mario He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!"
"My therapist told me that if ignorance is bliss, there's no reason for me to be on antidepressants."
"4, 6, 8 and 9 have all been killed... 2, 3, 5, 7 and 11 are the prime suspects."