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Joke of the Day

"My relationship Looks like vasectomy made a vas deferens to my relationship..."

"I accidentally wore a red shirt to Target today and, long story short, I'm covering for Debbie this weekend."

"How do you make hard cider? Put it in the freezer."

"Thinking of getting another kitchen table just for all my mail"

"I think the problem is that I'm 20% stud and 80% muffin."

"What's a necrophiliacs favorite drink? Doesn't matter, so long as it's stiff."

"What's dumber than three blondes building a house underwater? Three brunettes trying to burn it down."

"*enter password* *wrong* *wrong* *wrong* *reset password* ... *new password can't be the same as old password*"

"Why did Hellen Kellar burn her ear? The phone rang and she answered the iron. Why did she burn her other ear? They called back."

"Why are African Americans called Negroes? Because their dicks grow to their knees. Negro=knee grow"