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Joke of the Day

"When the machines become self aware their first order of business will be changing our perception of how robots dance."

"The Ancient Mayans have predicted the world will end on December 21, 2012. They also worshipped a Corn God named Ah Mun."

"People say that Twitter is pointless but it's teaching my children to be self sufficient."

"What do you call a group of Rhode Islanders? A traffic accident."

"Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? He had lost his contacts!"

"Sausages... They're the wurst."

"[at restaurant on 1st date pretending not to be an eel] Date: The wine is lovely great choice Me: *helplessly slips off chair*"

"Q: Why can't a bicycle stand up? A: It is two tired."

"Alzheimer joke (can't remember if repost)"

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, cause they can't change anything. (Just told to me by my 12 year old son.)"