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Joke of the Day
"People say that Twitter is pointless but it's teaching my children to be self sufficient."
Next Joke
"My girlfriend asked me if I felt like aural. I think that's where it goes in one ear and out the other."
"My girlfriend wanted a marriage just like a fairy tale... I gave her some bread crumbs and left her in the forest."
"REV. SHARPTON Calling Al Sharpton a reverend is like calling Jeffrey Dahmer a chef"
"If you buy organic and don't tell someone about it, is it still organic?"
"What's the definition of perfect pitch? Throwing a banjo into a dumpster and hitting an accordion with it."
"I need a career involving less interaction and more pizza. I've narrowed it down to: Pizza Farmer Pizza Hunter Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle"
"What's a cats most common written thought? ,.........mmmnhhhhgcdddxxdtyyhhbvbbb"
"My friend told me she's going back to school for Psychiatry... I said: ""That's crazy talk."""
"Vegetables What did the cucumber say to the cabbage when they got kidnapped by the tomato? Lettuce go"