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Joke of the Day

"My dad was born with a conjoined twin He was the uncle on my dad's side. But don't worry, the doctors were able to separate them. Now he's my uncle once removed."

"I hate the term ""Hipster"" It's too mainstream"

"What band's fanbase is the most charitable? U2, they're all pro-bono."

"How do you tell if a girl in Nebraska is a virgin? She can outrun her brothers... *mic drop* ""I'm out..."""

"I stopped at the bookstore to pick up the book I ordered on how to get through life with an extremely small penis. It isn't in yet."

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? Because it's white and settles on their land"

"I named my penis ""Secret"" Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman"

"Push up bras A push-up bra is like a bag of chips. You open it up and its half empty."

"Friend: What time is it? Me: (pulls out phone, checks Twitter and Facebook notifications, puts phone away) Friend: Well? Me: Well what?"

"Why do some birds fly south for the winter? Its to far to walk."