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Joke of the Day

"Two atoms are walking down the street... And the first one says ""shit man, i dropped an electron!"" ""Are you sure?"" Says the second one. ""Yeah, im positive!"""

"Knock Knock... Who's there? Sean Bean. Sean Bean who? Oh that's right, you started watching after his character died. Works for pretty much anything Sean Bean is in except Sharpe."

"I just sighed so hard, I won't have to dust for 6 months."

"2% of Japanese have cataracts... The rest drive Toyota and Nissan."

"A gift card that only allows the user to purchase more gift cards until they finally go insane."

"Did you know that you can fit any boat on your head like a hat, if you flip it over? That makes it cap sized"

"Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he was fat and ugly and no one liked him"

"TRAIN TIP: A few minutes before the train arrives at your destination, get up and crowd around the exit so you can wait faster."

"I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York."

"Why did the airplane no longer work? Because it was **terminal**ly ill. I'll show myself out."