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Joke of the Day

"[calls home] son: hello me: hi, put mom on the phone son: I can't me: why son: she's too heavy"

"What's Donald Trump's favorite sport, according to CNN? Dodgeball."

"Hey Seattle do you want to win a Superbowl???? "" No thanks we'll pass!! """

"Why does Waldo wear stripes? He doesnt want to be spotted."

"I get confused by Burqas. I accidentally posted a letter in a Muslim woman yesterday."

"I'd like to see every photograph where I'm just someone passing in the background."

"Why was Muhammad a successful merchant? Because he was god's profit."

"I'm working on my second $million I finally gave up on the first."

"I see ISIS is finally practicing Structured Programming. They're eliminating GOTOs."

"25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness. That's scary... It means 75% are running around untreated."