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Joke of the Day

"Dear whoever is playing sweet child o' mine at 2:30 in the night at full blaring volume to disturb the whole neighborhood......NICE!"

"What do you call a Muslim with a kebab? A kaBOMB...*hah*"

"Me: Watcha got there? 8: Lemonade. Me: What kind? 8: Mike's Me: Nooooooo"

"Me: OMG, Bill and Cindy got divorced!!! Hub: I know! He's got a fresh slate. That guys livin the dream! Me:... Hub:...his dream, not mine"

"Q: Did you hear about the ghoul who had eight arms? A: He said they came in handy."

"Bucket list: 1. Don't die."

"*wife walks in* *sees cheese balls everywhere* *shakes head* ""what? 8 won't get better at catching food in his mouth if we don't practice"""

"A farmer in (x-town) who rolled over a cart of horse manure... Is reported in ""stable condition."""

"""You're what you eat"" So say hello to your new Mum ;)"

"Did you hear about the guy who has a fetish for cashews? He's fucking nuts."