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Joke of the Day

"[Watching boxing] Sure bro, I watch boxing all the ti- HEY DID YOU SEE WHAT HE JUST DID?! HE JUST PUNCHED THAT GUY! SOMEONE CALL THE COPS!"

"Women: underwear are not hot pants/short shorts. THEY ARE UNDERWEAR AND YOU GIVE ME A BONER"

"Sometimes I open my mouth and a dad joke falls out and we both just need to walk away from that and remember better times ok"

"I don't care if Ernie and Bert are gay or not, but how do they afford that apartment? Do they even have jobs."

"What's ISIS favourite meal? Turkey! Its the bomb!"

"I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste."

"I asked my North Korean friend how it was to live in North Korea. He said he can't complain."

"What do rednecks call the BATF? The Bureau of All Things Fine."

"So two condoms walk into a bar.. .. They quickly realize that it is a gay bar. One condom turns to the other and says, ""Dude. We are gonna get shitfaced tonight!"""

"What type of meat do catholic priests eat on Friday? Nun."