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Joke of the Day

"Why do Mexicans always have red eyes after sex? Pepperspray..."

"My wife has been missing for a week now. Police have told me to prepare for the worst. So I have been to the charity shop to get all her clothes back."

"Don't get me started. I don't come with brakes."

"I kept reading a book about Gawker... But every page kept going back to Chapter 11"

"What 3 candies do you find in school? Redhots, DumDums, and smarties."

"Why is a day at the office the same as Christmas? Because you do all the work, and the fat guy with the suit gets all of the credit."

"You like sleeping? Me too! We should do it together sometime."

"I'm scared of lifts Guess I have to take steps to avoid them"

"What's one of the worst things about giving a man a blow job? The view."

"I took a public speaking class in college. I did a presentation about Free Speech. It was mostly just about the website where I downloaded my speech."