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Joke of the Day

"no dude, if i wash my hands BEFORE going to the bathroom then they won't get my genitals dirty and i won't have to wash my hands after. duh"

"*Feels the chill* Chill: I have a boyfriend"

"For as long as I remember I've always had amnesia."

"I hate people with club feet... I'm lack toes intolerant."

"I asked my mother if I could have some cloth to give to the nuns. She said, ""Fine, just don't let it become a habit"""

"Why were the bakers hands brown? Because he kneeded a poo"

"What's the difference between bullets and everyone? Everyone misses Harambe."

"You must be twins. You're too stupid to be one person. #MyBestInsult"

"Hey baby, have you got a time machine? Cuz' I could go back in time to approach you with a better pickup line than this one"

"How do you get a fat chick into bed? Piece a' cake!"