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Joke of the Day
"Boycott shampoo demand real poo instead"
Next Joke
"Are you gonna tattle to HR every time I threaten to burn your baby? Grow up!"
"[blood bank] Doc inserts needle [turns around] YOU AGAIN! [vampire sucking on tube like straw] GO ON SCOOT [chases him from room with broom]"
"When I was 9, I was touched by an Angel. Angel Martinez, currently serving 16 years."
"What do you call the Japanese demon of spices? The Pepper Oni."
"Okay mum...you know I love you...but I can't accept your friend request on Facebook."
"If someone feeds you alphabet soup... Is that putting words in your mouth? Also, if they are about to feed you and pull back, is that taking the words out of your mouth?"
"New neighbours just moved in... I baked them some goodies as a welcome & a warning to never eat at my house."
"911 I JUST SAW TWO TRANSFORMERS FIGHTING ""Mr Bay, please stop doing this every time you see a car crash"""
"My husband suggested I tone down the Botox and just age gracefully. And I laughed and laughed. But didn't scowl. Cuz Botox."