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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer? A: It would be tough to be an idiot all day long."

"When do e-mails stop being in black and white? When they are read."

"During a zombie apocalypse, establish dominance by approaching the baddest zombie with the snappiest teeth and braid his hair."

"Why does the hobo only drink coffee? Because he has no proper tea! Hehehhehahahahhhehveahhs"

"Listen, I'll let you borrow any Disney movie I've got except for one. I'm never gonna give you Zootopia. I'm a fucking furry. *Gotcha!*"

"What is a hipster's favorite candy? Rolos."

"What did the police officer say to his stomach? I've got you under a vest."

"So my friend asked me how often I make chemistry jokes. I replied ""Periodically"""

"I hate self-promotional people. They're so into themselves they probably don't even realize I have a new album available on iTunes now"

"FYI: I guess the goal of bobbing for apples is not who can drink all the water."