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Joke of the Day

"You know you're old when... ...what were we talking about?"

"Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?"

"Why do people like amputee porn? It fucking stumps me."

"Congratulations on passing your test! You are HIV-positive"

"Why did my Exotic Bird Startup Store fail? I didn't have enough seed money."

"It truly bothers me how many people would marry someone just for their money. Because I'm trying to do that & you're lowering my chances."

"What is a suicide bomber's favorite TV show? The Big Bang Theory."

"- What do you think about the coming battle General? - God knows it will be lost. - Then why should we go for it? - To find out who is the loser."

"BLOND DOG Q: Why does a blond dog have lumps on his head? A: He's been chasing parked cars."

"What does a tomato and a potato have in common? Both are red,except from the potato."