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Joke of the Day

"WOULD YOU RATHER: have six arms or giant antlers? (You don't really get a choice; the surgeons were just sort of curious.)"

"S/O to side walks, my legs, elevators, my arm, and my eyes For keeping me off the streets, helping me to stand up for my self, picking me up when I'm down, giving me a hand and showing me the light."

"Not to get technical, but according to Chemistry...Alcohol is a solution."

"What did the electrician say while swimming across a river? ""Oh my God, that's a lot of current!"""

"How was your thanksgiving? >> Very stuffing."

"How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Ten-tickles."

"We now have tortilla chips shaped as functional shovels to minimize calories burned when scooping junk into our mouths. Your move, diabetes"

"What's the difference between 'Oh' and 'Oooh'? About three inches"

"Add wife, have life If you marry one woman, She will fight with you. But, if you marry 2 women, They will fight for you. Think different. Add wife, have life"

"When I shake hands with a fat guy I don't like, I do it extra hard to get a good moob bounce going"