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Joke of the Day

"My gf broke up with me.... She said, ""It's okay we can still be cousins.."""

"Why you never mess with imported ants? Because they are **important**."

"Why did the bald guy cut a hole in his pocket? Because he wanted to run his fingers through his hair."

"I hate unoriginal jokes on Reddit..... said the chicken as he walked across the road"

"How do they practice safe sex in Wyoming? They mark the sheep that kick."

"Bless me, Father, for I have used Comic Sans. It's been eight weeks since my last use of Helvetica."

"I told my GF I was buying her some diamonds for her birthday. She said that nothing would please her more. So I got her nothing."

"Today we are offering the twin tower special... Two can dine for $9.11. Desert is $7.47 each."

"What do you get if you cross a phone with a rooster? A wake-up call!"

"Apparently you can't get a sick leave just because you're sick of seeing everyone at the office."