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Joke of the Day

"Me: Have you ever heard of the movie ""Constipation""? You: Um.. no Me: Thats because it hasn't come out yet!! lelelelelelelelelelelelololol"

"What's wrong with the phrase ""War on Drugs""? Wars end."

"[Dog Court] Judge: How do you find the defendant? Jury: We find the defendant, not a good boy. *dogs family in courtroom begins to cry*"

"What is Santa Claus' favorite metal band? Sleigher"

"Black and Blue? So I asked the question,"" Black and Blue or Gold and White"" ? ""It doesn't matter Sir"" replied the Police Officer ""Your wife still has extensive bruising"""

"What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth? Tooth (truth) or Consequences."

"[in the woods] Me: *rescues a deer from a bear trap* Deer: I have a boyfriend"

"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking."

"What do whales do on dates? Netflix and Krill"

"Atilla the Hun, Adolf Hitler and a lawyer are stranded with you on a island ... - and you have a gun with only 2 bullets, who do you shoot? -- The lawyer twice."