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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a weird Russian? Off-Putin."

"The New York Post asked dozens of comedians working in America to pick the funniest jokes they've heard in the past year - and compiled a list of 50 of the best."

"I want to name my next pet Peeve."

"My wife calls my penis Nicolas Cage It's highly temperamental and tends to go off for no reason at all."

"I keep a sandwich in a holster strapped to my ankle for emergencies... It's a ""below knee sandwich"""

"[talking to myself in the mirror] ""You will not be awkward today."" Person: ""Hey"" Me: ""Good. How are you?"""

"Trump was recently asked his opinion on Roe vs. Wade... He thought it was two different ways to get across the Potomac."

"I am aware that smoking will kill me, please explain to me again how you'll live forever"

"Amber Alert, but for the TV remote"

"Guy asked me where I got my green eyes. Great! Now I have to explain what the Vikings did when they got to Sicily."