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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor"
Next Joke
"Michael Jackson breaks into WALMART. He only steals lotion. Turning to the security camera he whispers ""smooth criminal"" and moonwalks away"
"My new years resolution is 1200x800"
"If you see a white guy in earbuds convulsing angrily with T. Rex arms, don't freak out. I'm just jamming out to Eminem."
"Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin. The Gravity of this Situation."
"[in Starbucks] ""It's Ian with one i"". ""We only need your first name Mr Wivwanaye""."
"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only 2, but I don't know how they got in there"
"Why can't you trust anything MATTER says? Because it makes up everything."
"I don't think I could ever do a threesome. I can't even satisfy one girl, let alone a girl and a guy."
"Do the right thing. Not right away, but like after you get called out."