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Joke of the Day

"How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for his birthday? He felt his presents."

"I was called a racist for saying black paint today... Apparently the correct term is, ""Tyrone paint the fence"""

"What's Dale Earnhardt's favorite Pink Floyd album? Dark side of the moon. You sick bastard."

"What did the mushroom say to the chef? Don't eat me! I'm a fun guy!"

"Why did the semen cross the road? I put on the wrong sock this morning"

"Teacher: If you saw me standing by a witch what fruit would it remind you of? Pupil: A pear."

"Why did Hitler suicide? He got the gas bill"

"China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you're a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you."

"What's the difference between a Greyhound Bus depot filled with old people, and a crab with DD boobs? One's a crusty bus station, and the others a busty crustacean."

"Pro-lifers Haven't they realised that you have to die to get to Heaven?"