185406

Joke of the Day

"10 yr old brother put a twist on this joke I saw awhile back. Why do the Irish serve up their chili with 139 beans? Because one more would be one-farty bowl of chili!"

"Golfers always bring two pairs of pants to the Masters. Just in case they get a hole in one."

"There's a special hole in my backyard for people to hit me in the back of the ankles with a shopping cart."

"What's a procrastinator's favorite punchline? I'll tell you tomorrow"

"I would tell you a butter joke... But you would probably just spread it."

"I had a job circumcising elephants. The pay wasn't much, but the tips were huge!"

"[Bee diary] Day one: met a really cute queen bee Day two: queen bee is now my gf Day three: my gf cheated on me with my 40,000 roommates"

"How many teenagers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, but you need a fairly big lightbulb."

"I was dating a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes I've just found out she's popped her clogs..."

"What's the best thing about twenty nine year olds? There's 20 of them"