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Joke of the Day
"[NSFW] What's the difference between a bucket of dead babies and a pile of sex toys? The bucket."
Next Joke
"[Spelling bee] Your word is Monogamous. M-O-N-O-T-O-N-O-U-S *2 Judges stare at each other* 1st judge *nods* 2nd judge: ""We'll allow it"""
"Close your eyes. Picture a world without hunger. Open your eyes. I ate your sandwich."
"Yo mamas so fat she walked in front of the tv and I missed 3 commercials."
"Why sharks are afraid to borrow money from other sharks! Because they are not just sharks, they are loan sharks!"
"What did the dyslexic bank robber say when he robbed the bank? ""Air in the hands motherstickers! This is a fuck up!"""
"Give a man a plane ticket... Give a man a plane ticket and he'll fly for a day. Push a man from a plane and he'll fly for the rest of his life."
"[introducing you to my family] ""this is my son Carson, my daughter Boatdaughter, & our dog Motorcyclepet"""
"So won't Surreal Slim Shady please stand up, please stand dOwN, please RIDE A TRICYCLE THROUGH A DENTISTS WAITING ROOM DRESSED AS A PENGUIN"
"What did one passive aggressive republican say to the passive aggressive democrat? I don't know, let me go check my Facebook feed."